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October 26, 2004
Line of Vision
The other day, the possibility of me getting laser eye surgery came up and it got me thinking...What would it be like to wake up in the morning and, after twenty years, see everything crisply, perhaps better than you could when you were born?
I have worn glasses since the second grade. My first pair was Peanuts themed and had a little Lucy decal on the outer hinge. I had a special case for them, too, as if that would make things cooler. Then I somehow acquired baby blue wire rims. And feathered hair. And bucked teeth. And some baby fat. You get the picture. No? Well, here it is.
My vision deteriorated quite quickly from the age of eight on. In fact, I cannot remember what it was like to wake up and actually be able to see. I loathed glasses from the beginning; I had to wear croakies at soccer practice, could not see when swimming, got zits under the frames from the humid Long Island summer heat.
My self-perception froze in time with those awkward photographs. No matter what kind of glasses frames, contact lenses, clothing, braces, hair dye, makeup, etc., I still saw that little kid with beaver teeth and powder blue glasses gawking back at me. Sometimes I still do.
In a sense, glasses worked to my advantage.
I could take them off and the mirror would blur. My image would be wiped from sight and the feelings, well, they could be put away.
My parents let me have contact lenses as soon as was old enough. I wore them, with the exception of a freak case of Bell’s palsy in eleventh grade, non-stop until January 2000. At certain points, I do not think I even owned a functional pair of glasses. Come hell or high water, I would not leave the house without those contact lenses in.
Then one night, after about two days of non-stop lens wearing and too many cosmos at Pravda, I stumbled home to discover that my eyes were filled with sticky gook. It took me nearly an hour to get them out of my eyes. It was time to stop wearing the contacts.
This turned out to be a good thing. Geek glasses were definitely back in style, and coupled with the fact that I actually am a geek, the frames fit me perfectly. I took a four-year hiatus from contact lenses, investing in them once more last December only because I had taken up serious running. (Running with glasses in the freezing cold hurts. Running with glasses in the sultry summer sucks.)
I still wear my glasses a lot. I find them comforting. Sometimes I feel as though I can hide behind them. Other times they make me feel like that awful, geeky little girl. Most of the time, however, I wear them because they are comfortable and my eyes are getting old and tired.
The other day I received an offer for laser eye surgery. It is something that I have been thinking about for a while, in that I could never afford it but wouldn’t it be nice and convenient way. I’d never really thought beyond the functional aspect of the surgery—the not having to get your eyes checked, to buy new glasses or upgrade your prescription every year, etc. With the offer on the table, I suddenly got a little nervous.
What if the surgeon screwed up and I couldn’t see at all? What would it be like to wake up in the morning and, after twenty years, see everything crisply, perhaps better than you could when you were born? Do I take the plunge and get my 20/20, or just go with the flow and expect to be wearing eight different kinds of bifocals and reading glasses around my neck by the time I'm forty?
Do I keep my bad vision and just take off my glasses to blur out the world, or just drink more cosmos from Pravda?
Posted by callalillie at October 26, 2004 4:38 AM | Introspect
Posted by: tien at October 26, 2004 8:15 AM
i know. i could chew trees down with those front teeth.
Posted by: corie at October 26, 2004 8:15 AM
oh, and as far as the lasers, i would hold off until it became cheaper, covered by healthcare, or i had the disposable income. besides, glasses are still in, no?
and i think glasses are a different issue for adults. we're all going blind, so a lot of people probably have a pair.
Posted by: tien at October 26, 2004 9:03 AM
yeah-- it's so not a vanity issue for me. it's more of a if i can do it, is it worth it? question. i wonder if, after the surgery, you will still need reading glasses with age. and cost effective questions-- i mean, i shell out 100-200 a year (at least) for an eye exam, new lenses, etc. over time that adds up. if the surgery would permanently fix it in one cost swoop, then is it worth it?
Posted by: corie at October 26, 2004 9:05 AM
I had the surgery about 5 years ago, after wearing glasses/contacts for about 15 years. All I can tell you is that it was the best money I've ever spent. I can't imagine having to wear the glasses/contacts again. Being able to see the alarm clock clearly is just a good feeling in the morning... at least until I realize what time it is. :)
They often tell you that you could still end up with reading glasses as you get older, but you can also find a place that does free "touch-ups" over time.
Posted by: Bill at October 26, 2004 9:16 AM
That picture is awesome! Alright, I'm probably going to screw this up, but... could you eat corn-on-the-cob through a knot hole?
Glasses are still going strong, thanks to Tina Fey. I would imagine laser surgery would always be worth it. It's just a matter of when, I guess. If I had the means, I'd probably do it.
Posted by: matt at October 26, 2004 9:47 AM
I probably could have shaved the corn off of the cob more easily. Thank goodness for braces (well, I guess I can say that now that I have some distance from them).
I'm sitting here in my glasses, which are one prescription behind my contacts and so scratched that I have trouble seeing out of them, and am beginning to see your point.
Posted by: corie at October 26, 2004 9:50 AM
My father had horrible eye sight as far back as I can remember. His lenses were quite thick. He was 33 when I was born. My Mother also has horrible eye sight. She is afraid to drive at night because of it. I can't remember a time when she did not wear glasses. She was 22 when I was born. I'm 31 years old now and I have great eye sight. I have never needed glasses. I'm not bragging. It just doesn't make sense to me. I think I am adopted.
Posted by: ccs178 (Chris) at October 26, 2004 9:58 AM
I would go for the surgery. For someone whose vision is obviously so important, I think the benefits will outweigh your anxieties.
Plus, you can keep your favorite, geekiest glass frames, put in clear lenses and wear those when you need to hide a little.
Posted by: Alexis at October 26, 2004 9:58 AM
I'm in the same place as you...although my Lucy glasses were powder pink. It's not so much "Should I do this crazy eye surgery thing, but could I?" There is a huge ick factor for me that came from my aunt's discription of when she had it done and intails the words: smell of burning flesh.
Posted by: Cynthia at October 26, 2004 11:29 AM
Yes, I've heard about that factor. I know the smell well from the umpteen million oral surgeries I had as a kid. It's gross.
Posted by: corie at October 26, 2004 12:10 PM
I never wear my glasses, which are about 7 years old. I think I'm due for an exam and some new frames. I do however, where sunglasses even at dusk and have been known to wear the occocassional accessory pair, which has a clear but UV protectant lens -- just for fun. Point: glasses are cool, at times.
Posted by: Jason at October 26, 2004 12:34 PM
I'm in the same boat. Glasses since I was 8 (I'm 31 now). I would LOVE to be able to see without glasses or contacts. But I am a BIG chicken and don't think they have enough long term data yet. But hey, that's just me. Bwak bwak! :-(
Posted by: carrster at October 26, 2004 5:54 PM
I've been blind as a bat since age 7, but I would never do laser surgery, too much risk involved and I am a chicken.
My vision is something like 20/900 and I've been told I'm a bad candidate anyway.
www.forgotten-ny.com
Posted by: Kevin Walsh at October 27, 2004 10:31 PM
